How to Feed a Picky Eater

I've gotten quite a few questions about this subject so I finally sat down to put together this post! I'm not a food expert. I'm just a mom with a picky eater. My thoughts are just that- my thoughts. They happen to be very effective with my daughter, but I don't know that they'll work for everyone.

And with that disclamer out of the way-


How to Feed a Picky Eater
8 Tips for getting your child to try new things

1. Treat your child like you would like to be treated.
There should be communication in all things with parenting. This goes for mealtimes, too. Children will learn to follow your guidance a lot better if you communicate to them why it is we need to do these things. Mealtime in our home is all about nutrition. We talk a LOT about what food does to our bodies. We talk about how different foods nourish different parts.
When we eat treats Brooklyn will ask if they’re healthy or what they do to our bodies and I tell her, “Treats aren’t that good for you, but sometimes it’s fun to eat something just because it’s yummy. Our bodies are healthy because we eat healthy things all the time. That means we can eat treats, too!”

2. Offer a variety at each meal and snack.
If there is a food your child doesn’t like chances are they’re going to turn up their nose even more if it’s all you offer them. When it’s presented like that it’s a solid way to tell your child, “This is a battle. This is all you will get and until you eat this there will be nothing else.” Without saying a word you are actually telling your child this food is to be hated.
Giving your child three or four items each time they sit down is sending them a message that eating is an explorative activity. There are often two new items at mealtimes in my house. I like introducing them to more than one new thing at once because I think it puts less pressure on them to like any one thing. My main tip with picky eaters is to make mealtimes as casual and nonchalant as possible. When there are no expectations they will feel more freedom to taste foods as they want to.

3. Encourage tasting each item.
Brooklyn dislikes a heck of a lot of foods. Sometimes she dislikes things just because of the way they look (this actually happens often). I encourage her to at least taste it before she passes judgement. I even tell her, “If you don’t like it you can spit it out.” This is pretty big in our house. Knowing she can spit it out if it tastes bad is huge for her. (Obviously she is standing by the garbage when she does this. I don’t like them spitting onto their plates. That has happened, though.)

4. Underplay mealtime. Put as little emphasis on new food experiences as possible.
I’m really good at this, I have to say. I approach mealtime in a very matter of fact way. It is not a battle ground. It is a time to get nourished. End of story. If you don’t like the nourishment offered, don’t eat it, I will not fight you on this at all. If Brooklyn is making a big deal about disliking something I tell her, “Brooklyn, you don’t have to like chicken, if you’re done eating you can go play.”

5. Don’t reheat the same food over and over to get your child to eat it.
I think this is a good way to assure your child will hate that food. I do reheat food, don’t get me wrong. If Brooklyn refuses something without even tasting it then I serve it at the next meal with the rest of the meal. I don’t only serve that food. I make a separate meal like I would any other day and add the food she’d refused earlier to the plate. I encourage her to taste it *see point 3* and if she doesn’t like it, it goes to Sierra (my garbage disposal who likes every food on the planet. Lol)

6. Compare new food to something your child already likes.
This one is a recent development that’s working well. Just this week, in fact, it was put into play by Allan. We were having pot roast for dinner. Presenting beef of any sort to Brooklyn is equivalent to presenting her with a piece of poo for dinner. Very recently she’s started liking bacon. Allan told Brooklyn, “Beef is like bacon*, Brooklyn. I think you’ll really like it.”
Now in the past Brooklyn would utterly refuse to even poke at the beef with her fork, let alone taste it, but with bacon in mind and a new view on her beef (hmm, maybe it won’t be as bad as I’m thinking), she tried it! For the first time she tasted beef. And, she ended up eating several bites of it.
*I realize bacon and beef are very different. It doesn’t have to be a really close comparison. Just reminding your child that something they’d previously thought was horrid is actually something they now love can open them up to new possibilities.

7. Be relatable. Acknowledge that there are foods you dislike.
I will let Brooklyn know if something isn’t the best food out there. If a piece of bread is starting to go stale I’ll tell her, “This sandwich I’m eating isn’t very good. The bread’s getting hard, but I’m going to finish it because I don’t want to waste it.” There are a couple foods I simply don’t like. If something’s not my favorite I’ll acknowledge that as well. Knowing parents have preferences just like them, helps the child see that mealtime isn’t a battle ground. I think that’s really important.

8. Pick your Battles.
This goes for a whole heckuva lot of things in parenting. It goes for food, as well. Does your child need to love salad? Will his/her life be ruined if they prefer ham over chicken? Will their health be seriously impacted by not liking green beans? The answer is, no. Find the healthy things your kids like and serve them often. Serve them with new foods that you think will benefit their growing bodies. When you make this a pleasant experience they will start to view it as a pleasant experience. Tasting new foods should be fun. Really!

And that is my view on feeding picky eaters! I’ve had 5 years to think about this and things are constantly changing and evolving with my approach with Brooklyn. The last few months, however, have been so much better. I plan the week’s meals and know that Brooklyn is getting everything she needs on the food pyramid every single day. I think only those of us with picky eaters understand how powerful a feeling that is!


Click Here for my "What they Eat" post
Click Here for my "What We eat Wednesday" Post